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I don’t do this often..

I don’t normally open up like this unless you’re close to me and that is only a select few. This pain and depression I’ve been going through is becoming unbearable. I can only keep myself going by keeping myself occupied during the day but when night rolls around finding sleep is impossible. I question my life and myself trying to find answers that would sooth me rather than be truthful to myself. That is no longer working, I only want the truth anymore. Maybe I’m too nice and people take advantage of that aspect but I believe it’s time for a change. No more putting other before me, I only end up getting hurt. No more consulting for others minor pains while they know I’m going through a great deal. It’s in my nature to care and attend to others at ll costs but unfortunately I’ve been screwed over way too many times for me to keep on going like this. I have a select few that no matter what I will go to the ends of the earth for and will always put them before myself, but anyone else is going to soon be shut out. I can’t believe things like this are happening and how fast life can fuck you over. All I want is too be happy.. I can’t even have that.. If anybody out there has some words for encouragement.. I could really use them. Thank you for listening.

#rant  #sadness  #mylife  #toonice  #change  #depression  #wantsomebodytotalktoo  

She makes me feel so complete <3

#happy  #Loved  #honored  #complete  #girlfriend  #mylove  

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